Nice Forward From Uncle Tim

{I agree with this...}

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YOU CAN'T STEAL MY CHRISTMAS

I don't know who they are, saying I can't greet the crowd the way that I want to. Can't say CHRISTMAS out loud. I walk into a business place, see things that I rather not see, but dare I not say CHRISTMAS, and ask for a "holiday" tree. What happened to freedom of speech, and living in the land of the free? How can they take my CHRISTMAS money, but can't say MERRY CHRISTMAS to me? Men and women have given their lives so we could still go free. I wonder how they would feel at saying "HOLIDAY" TREE? Come on, AMERICA, let's wake up! Don't let our freedom escape. If they get by with doing this what else will they take? This is starting to get out of hand, and I've begun to keep track. Well, I've just about had enough. I'M TAKING CHRISTMAS BACK. So MERRY CHRISTMAS, AMERICA. I hope this gets all over the net. If we all stand united and take freedom back 'twill be our best CHRISTMAS YET!

Merry Christmas Everybody

That Insane Friday!!!

Goodness! How was YOUR Friday? Let me tell you, mine sucked!!! Actually... No, it was pretty fun, now that I think about it. Heh heh. It should've sucked, but it didn't. How weird is that?! It was a very full day. Not very productive, but full... I woke up around 8:20, I think it was. 8:20 in the A.M. I ate. I went to the floodwall for my daily freeze / torture / walk. 9:45, I went to the Post Office (Surprise, no mail for me!!! Sarcastic...) I came home. Checked my email (Surprise, no mail for me!!! Heh.) I watched "Quantum Leap." 11:15, I ate again (some deliciously tastey South Beach Diet Southwestern Grilled Chicken soft tacos. Two of them, and a small cup of cherry Jello. And, I never ate again the rest of the day. Didn't even get hungry... Weird...). 11:40, left for work. Had to stop at the bank, first, and then go to the liquor store to pick up Chris's usual 5th of Maker's Mark (every Christmas, this happens to me! I don't drink. I don't frequently visit the liquor store. Just every year for CHRIStmas. Chris.) 11:57, clocked on for work. Did the usual, there. Turkeys, chicken, hamburger, hams, all day... 4:55pm, lunch. I left a couple minutes earlier than planned, because work was so insanely busy I didn't want to wait for 5:00 to roll around. I left while I had a chance. So, "lunch." I didn't eat. I went to the mall with Chris. Bath & Body Works (first time I've ever been in there!), Dawhares, Peebles, and Magic Mart (for the second time since I quit working there. The first was, oddly enough, also with Chris. I felt really awkward being there the first time. Not as bad, today.) Oh yeah, then we went to WalMart. 6:05, back to work. Work, work, work... And, I didn't get off work until 11:58pm!!! I worked a 12-hour shift!!! Crap, man!!! I ended the week with 53.19 hours. Gotta be a world record, or something! Heh heh. So, if you're wondering why I haven't been in contact much this week, that's why. I worked myself silly! But, it was fun. That's the weird thing. Fun?! At Christmas time?! Christmas 2004 "broke me," and made me lose the will to work any longer. I started job-hunting in January 2005, as a result. I didn't find any jobs, of course, and the rest is, as they say, history... CHANGES, BABY!!! This time last year I was miserable because of work. This year, my normal life kinda has me miserable, and I look forward to working to escape... I'm pretty confident that the future will be better, but, as I said a couple posts ago, I'm living in the present tense now, and I'm not worried about the future anymore... Because I know it's going to be awesome. Betcha didn't know I was psychic, did you? Yeah, there's a lot you don't know! Ummm... Yeah.... Anyway... So, it's 1am now. I have to wake up for work at 6am. Working back on my normal, early hours next week. 7-4 tomorrow... Lunch at 12... And, the beat goes on... Smile for me. I'm happy being with my friends. It's fun to have friends again. I'm happy?! Wow! Yeah, I think so... Hope your world is as fun as mine. Funner, actually. I'm just easily amused. Maybe my world seems boring to you. Who knows?! But, yeah, smile. Be happy. Be thankful. Love. Yeah, I can't wait for the future. It's going to be great! But, the present tense ain't so bad...

Ever heard of MySpace.com? It's a pretty cool place to be. A friend introduced me to it. I've been hanging out there more than I have here, lately. I've sent everyone I know email-thingies, inviting y'all to sign up. Not many takers on that, for some reason... Come on, people! Get with it! I need more friends there! I've only got 11 right now. Most people have, like, a gazillion, or something.

Ever mail a letter, and then, after you drop it in the box, think, "Man, I shouldn't have mailed that!," because you said some pretty dumb things in the letter? That's happened to me twice, lately. I mean, letter #1 was dumb, you know? And, I tried to correct the dumbness of that letter, in letter #2, yesterday, and, I think, I probably did more damage than good... Can we just pretent like I never mailed either one of those letters? You know, the one in August, before I went to Myrtle Beach, and the one yesterday... That would be nice... It's just... I don't know! I can't find the words to say! I don't know whether to be bubbling with joy, or if I should just jump off a cliff... Wasn't there a lame 80's movie, where this guy mailed a letter like that, and then he tried to beat the mail truck to his girlfriend's house, and steal the letter from the mail man, so his girlfriend wouldn't see how lame he was? Remember that one? Andrew McCartney, I think... I could TOTALLY do that, you know? Thing is, the letter has a pretty good head start on me, now. I estimated that the letter would arrive in her hands by Friday. What if it gets there tomorrow?! I don't know... I mean, I feel weird! Why can't I just feel like I have always felt, for the last 11 years? Why do I always feel like I'm embarrassing myself now?! Why can't I just be myself?! It's weird, man...

I'm not exercising enough!

I'm listening to some Mexican music, right now. Chingon. Makes me feel better. Happy music.

MERRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE!!!

Dumb Dream #1

Okay, it's official, now. I'm OFFICIALLY a weirdo! I had the stupidest dream EVER, last night. I dreamed that I was asked to drive a school bus. Take the kids to school, you know? I don't know what happened to the regular bus driver. I was just walking down the road (at the railroad crossing to be exact), and there was a school bus sitting there, full of kids. My dad was there, for some reason. He's the one that asked me to drive the bus. I was like, "Dad, why don't YOU drive it?! I don't even know how to drive a stick!" He said, "Oh, there's nothing to it. Go ahead, and take these kids to school. It'll just take you a few minutes." I paused, and looked at him kinda confused. Then, he snapped at me (as Dad tends to do, with his short temper, and all), "Hurry up, you're going to make them late for school!" So, I drove a school bus full of kids to school. I did a pretty good job at it, actually. Maybe that's a sign from God, or something... "Go forth, and drive school buses. Let not ye waste ye time working at the grocery store." Could be...

19 Days Later...

For the first time in a VERY long time, I'm living in the present tense. For the longest time, I've not been able to do that. Am I making sense? What I'm saying is, I used to always be thinking about the past... "The Good Old Days" of 1992, or whatever. I'd be all depressed, and stuff, thinking, "Woe is me! If only life could be as good as it used to be!" You know, there's that, and the future, too. Yeah, I used to spend my time either living in the past, or the FUTURE. Not that I'm trying to be all Sci-Fi, or something. I'm serious! I'd spend my days day-dreaming about what's going to happen. What might happen. What could happen. Crap like that. So, yeah, I'm living in the PRESENT TENSE now, for a change. And, I'm loving every minute of it! I appreciate the past, and all, but I don't need to live there anymore. And, I could care less about the future. Whatever happens will happen for a reason. NOW is good. Oh, man, now is SOOO good!!! I'm extremely grateful. YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?! WEST SIDE, Y'ALL!

Hey, I've not blogged for a while! I'm all sleepy, and stuff. I should've went to bed an hour ago. Big day of fun planned for tomorrow. I should rest, actually... I'll blog later. Oh, yeah, my wrist is doing better now.

Attack of the One-Armed Man

I screwed my left wrist up, yesterday, at work. I did it at work, but it's not work's fault. Mom thinks I should report it, and whatnot, but, hey, these things happen! I mean, if the store sign, out front, would've fell on my wrist, or something, then yeah, I'd probably report it. But, the thing is, I was weighing hams, as I tend to do this time of year. My wrist popped out of place. And, it just kinda KEPT POPPING EVERY FIVE MINUTES after that. So, I'm sporting this big, black brace on my wrist now. I kinda like the attention. People keep saying, "What'd you do to your wrist Junebug?" You know, those people who pretend to be concerned... Heh. But, yeah, I'm going to be in this thing for the next week or so. I took it off, a few minutes ago, to wash up, and it popped immediately. Big fun pain! Funny thing is, my right wrist has been giving me trouble for the last couple weeks. It was feeling better, yesterday, and then I hurt the left one! Hilarious, huh? Hey, at least I can still play my guitar, so it's not THAT much of a bother.

I had a little spur-of-the-moment road trip up to Fostoria, OH, yesterday. One of my uncles died, Monday. My dad's oldest brother, Edgel. He was 83 years old. He'd been sick for the last couple years, so it's good that he's not suffering anymore, and he's in a better place now. Wish I would've known him, he lived a very full, and fruitful life. He would've been fun to have in my life, as I was growing up... Anyway... All along, my dad was saying that he didn't want to go to the funeral. All of a sudden, yesterday, around 1:00, he declared that he was going to go. Only problem there is that he doesn't know how to drive anywhere! So, he called 2 of his sisters, Martha, and "10," told them to get ready to go, because I was going to drive the 3 of them to Fostoria for the funeral. Heh heh. Dad's weird like that. So, I drove up them there... A 7-hour trip from Chatty... In my mom's car... Supposedly, it has more room in it than my car does. I can't see it, though. I was CRAMPED in that little thing, man! The whole thing was very rushed. We got there around 10, last night, I made a phone call (last time I'd ever talk to her... Had I known that I would've said more), woke up this morning, ate breakfast with Uncle Jim, went to the funeral, and came back home -- in a nice little snow storm. INSANITY!!! I wish I would've had more time to prepare the trip. It would've been nice to have seen some sights, and stuff. I could've even looked up my old pen pal, Dea, while I was in town. Even though we haven't been in touch for the last 7 or 8 years, or something. It still would've been cool to have met her. But, hey, I guess you don't really have time to plan things when it comes to funerals... All in all, it was a pretty nice little trip, though.

Hey, ever have one of those days? You know... THOSE days. A day when a big event happens, and you suddenly realize, "Man, this changes EVERYTHING!" It's very exciting. This day, for me, started Friday night... On my 30th birthday, of all days! And, the significance of this day continuted into last night (Speaking in terms of these Earth-shattering days, they tend to last longer than normal, 24-hour cycles.). And, even more today! The dark clouds are lifting. It feels good! It's fun to start to have a social life again!

Oh, and I'm learning to appreciate the art of coffee. =)

Sleepy, man...

I'm going to try something out of character. I'm going to start living! I'm going out for a night on the town, with "Brother" J.R., tonight. Should be interesting.

But, I'm so friggin' sleepy, man!

Another "new year's resolution," of sorts... I decided to take another stab at online dating, last night... I don't know... Maybe, huh?

Man, why am I so sleepy?!

I slept good last night, by the way. Fixed my box springs, I think. I've had this cramp in my neck, for the last 4 or 5 days, though. I slept on it all wrong, the other night, while trying to ease the pain in my back. I can't seem to get this cramp worked out, and it's getting annoying.

I think I'll take a short nap...

30 Going On 90

Today is my 30th birthday. Exciting, no? Ummm... Happy birthday, me! I feel like I'm about 90 years old. My back has been killing me for the past couple weeks. Today seems to be the most painful. I couldn't figure out what was happening to me. I mean, I'm "only" 30. I shouldn't be in this kind of pain. I exercise, and crap, all the time. I'm HEALTHY, except for the whole bad heart thing. So, I got to thinking, "What is this all about?!" Well... Turns out that there's a GOOD POSSIBILITY that it's my matress box-spring. The thing is lumpier than... Well, a big pile of lumps, or something. I'm going to play around with it some, and see if I can't invent a way to sleep comfortably tonight. Wish me luck.

In other news, I sold my first Ebay item, last night. It's very exciting! I've been registered on Ebay for almost 7 years now. I always used it to just buy things, you know? About a year ago, I decided, "Hey, I can use this as a tool for making some extra money!" So, I tried to sell a few old VHS tapes. Turns out that no one wants VHS anymore... Then, I tried to sell a green crayon. That didn't work, either. I don't know if people would prefer to have a whole set of crayons, or what went wrong there... But, last night, I sold a book! I'm now $8.74 richer. AWESOME!

Hope everyone out there had a nice Thanksgiving, yesterday. I guess mine was okay. I was pretty sore, as earlier noted. It was cool to get to spend some time with my grandparents, without any interruptions, though.

Looks like I'll be spending most of today hanging up Christmas decorations. Going to see a movie with Mom, later. Then, I might go to the gym, or something. Pretty typical day. Back to work, tomorrow. The beat goes on...

"Breaking My Heart"

Matt Hales... Aqualung

Need to know
I don't want to know
Already know
I've seen the signs
I watch you as you pull yourself away from me

Can't believe
Want to believe
How can I believe
When you make me doubt
I thought I knew you
I don't even know myself

I'm losing faith, I'm losing all faith

You're breaking my heart
Breaking my heart
You're breaking my heart again
Don't ask me to start
Ask me to start
Don't ask me to start again
Start again

Want to fight
Afraid to fight
Why don't I fight and make you see
I hold my breath
And disappear inside myself

I'm losing strength, I'm losing all faith

I'm losing you
I'm losing you

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(Man... I'm telling you, that dude can write songs! I think I'll order the other Aqualung CD. I love that sad-like music!)

Who Is Dwight Yokam?!

Okay... Forgive me for my lack of music knowledge here. I mean, I'm a musical freak, I should know these things. But, apparently, there is a country music singer by the name of Dwight Yokam. I hate country music, but I hear things, you know? Well... There's this weird thing... This old man used to come into the grocery store all the time, and say, "You look just like Dwight Yokam! I'm going to bring you a cowboy hat one of these days." He'd do this shtick every time he'd see me. So... When I worked at Magic Mart, this guy I worked with looked at me one day, and said, "Man, don't take this the wrong way, but I think you look just like Dwight Yokam. I swear, if you had a white cowboy hat on, I wouldn't be able to tell y'all apart." So, I kinda nervously said, "Thanks, man." Okay... So, today, it happened AGAIN! I was on my way to my car, and Phillip the "Heiners Bread Man" said, "Hey, Buddy. My wife wants to know if you're any relation to Dwight Yokam? She said you look just like him." What is this crap, man?! Okay... So... Let's settle this thing, once and for all... What do YOU think?

My official movie of the moment is "The Weather Man." Yeah... Maybe I'm cheating, since Nicolas Cage is my favorite actor, but, really, it IS a good movie. I like that movie, man! That's the movie I saw yesterday. Probably not the idea movie to take your mom to, but, hey, what can you do? Anyway... Go see that movie now. Thank me later.

Last known photo...



Got this yesterday. I like the nifty, new WV license design. They change it, like, every 5 years now. That kinda sucks. Hey, some people are into that kind of thing, though...

Hey, according to my "dashboard," this is my 100th post. I guess this calls for a celebration, or something, huh? So... Go ahead, and celebrate.

As you know, I've been going through this weird, transition sort of thing, these last couple months. I think the transition is almost complete now. Last night was sorta, like, a new beginning for me. I like last night. What a great night last night was! I went to the big rock show with Brother Roger, and his wife, Nora. 3 Doors Down, man!!! Yes, sir!!! What an awesome band!!! I've always liked their CDs, and stuff, you know, but seeing them live was a real treat! AWESOME band, there. I had a great time!!! Shinedown, the opening band, are not so bad, either. I really like Shinedown! Good night. Cool night. Awesome night. God bless Brother Roger. God bless Nora. God bless little Aaron, who I've yet to meet. God bless Shinedown. God bless 3 Doors Down. God bless "ROCKY!!!" It feels good to re-discover what's really important in life. I think I'm done with my anger, and bitterness, and whatnot. I'm starting to feel happy again. I don't think the transition will be complete until I can get out of my office job, though. Yeah, I'm still working there part time, while I'm working at the store the other part of the time. But, getting back with my friends has done wonders for me.

New Antiseptic Anxiety!!!

Antiseptic Anxiety entered the studio, today, to record their first album in nearly 4 years. The band is showing signs of evolving drastically since their other 2 albums. But, with song titles like "Dead Rat," "Sugar On The Table," and "I Had To Fart," long-time fans of the band will not be disappointed. Three songs were recorded on this historic day. The new CD, which is still untitled at the moment, should be completed in a couple weeks. More updates soon...

Hey, believe it or not, I finally figured out how to operate my Zoom PS-04 digital recorder thing! Actually, some nice folks in a message board told me how to do it. I read the instructions, like, 50 times, and wasn't getting anything out of them. So, anyway... YESSSSS!!! New Cruel Music coming soon. Very soon. Sooner than you might think. Really. Wow. Now I'm all nervous! And, I'm not in the mood to record any of those "silly love songs" anymore. Maybe I'll just write something else... Something nice and aggressive! Stay tuned...

Hey, who needs a digital camera?!

You know what I hate the most about this office job? I'M NOT GETTING ENOUGH EXERCISE! I didn't even notice it, man, but, the other day, Steve said, "You're getting too used to sitting on your ass all day, and you're getting fat," or something along those lines. So, I went home, looked in the mirror, and, by golly, Steve's right! I'm getting fat! Like the latter-days Jim Morrison, or Elvis, or something. Am I dying? Hmm... The weird thing is, I haven't really gained any weight. I've been 180 for the last 4 years. Now, I'm 184. What the crap, huh?! So, yeah, going back to the grocery store will be a good thing! I get plenty of exercise there! Actually, I'm going to start going to the gym, when the weather gets worse. "Citi Gym," as they call it. You're welcome to join me there, you know? I think "Brother JR" is going to start going with me, when I start going. My gut... Man... Wish I had a digital camera! I'd post a picture of this thing! I look like an Ethopian, or something. All bony, and stuff, but with a huge gut. What's happening to me?!

Hey, yeah, I like The White Stripes, too. There's actually a few new bands out that I like! Wow! I'm in shock! I guess the White Stripes are about 5 years old, though, so that's not so new. Gorillaz, and Coldplay, too... Wow. Maybe I *DON'T* like new bands, after all.

I think I've heard "Monster Mash" enough today, thank you... Has Halloween ALWAYS been this cheesey?

That's funny! Listening to Faction, on my way home from my nightly stroll along the floodwall, and they started playing "Black Number 1," by Type O Negative. It's still on, right this minute. I know, because I'm listening to it on my computer now! It's cracking me up. First time I've smiled all day... All month, maybe... Type O Negative. Heh. GAWD, this song is still on!!! I can't believe I used to like Type O Negative, back when that CD came out. Hilarious! Me and Peanut used to really get into them, man. We actually covered this song, "Black Number 1," a few times in Emanon. FUNNY STUFF! Randy is all into them, still. "Dude Randy," as Kmarters know him... Type O Negative. Man... These guys are horrible!

Hey, Happy Halloween, by the way. I saw this girl, dressed up like the girl from "The Ring," on my way home, while I was listening to "Black Number 1. (Oh wow! Song change! The Misfits. "London Dungeon." Faction is having this big Halloween music marathon. I think the Hair Metal channel is, too. Music is so dumb, sometimes...). Anyway, I think the "Ring" girl had the best costume. I saw this one dead cheerleader. That was sorta cool, too.

I missed the White Stripes concert on Left Of Center, last night. I was too sleepy. The concert didn't start until 11. I was long gone by that time. Out cold. I went to bed at 9.

How great is Tom Green?

I'm a few steps closer to learning how to use my Zoom PS-04. Yeah, I've had the thing for, like, 3 weeks now, or something. I've not been inspired enough to use it, so I haven't even took the time to learn how it works. Life sucks.

You know... Some people seem to be against the idea of my decision to return to the grocery store. I've tried to explain things the best way that I can, with my limited understanding of human vocabulary, and all. I don't know how I can make it any clearer. 1- I don't like office work. 2- I don't have insurance at my office job. 3- I don't have vacations at my office job. 4- I was making more money at the store(Yeah... I *KNEW* that would get your attention! MONEY!!! YEAH!!! EVERYONE LOVES MONEY, RIGHT?! That's what life's all about, MAKE AS MUCH MONEY AS YOU CAN!!! It'll give you better status in the afterlife!). 5- I'm not happy at my office job (Not that I'm a happy person to begin with, but when you work at a job you hate, you get even MORE depressed. Trust me.) 6- I was appreciated at the store. I had friends there. I had people I could depend on, if I ever needed a shoulder to cry on. Yeah, they're always available for me. They have time for me. Yeah, so the work gets aggravating sometimes. So what?! It's not like there are any better jobs around here... And, since I'm doomed to spend the rest of my miserable life HERE, I might as well make the most of it! So, for those of you, who think I'm crazy for leaving my "nice office job," do me a favor... BITE ME!!! You don't have ANY idea what it's like! Now. =)

In related news... I'll be back at the groecery store FULL-TIME, starting Saturday. My last week of the office job... Wooo Hooo!!!

Don't know if you've ever been held hostage... I would certainly hope not... But, that's kinda like me. It's nothing new, really. I've BEEN held hostage since... Well, a while now. I was fond of tracing it back to, like, June, but now that I think about it, I've been held hostage since around 1999. Somewhere around there. Yeah, that's about right. Imprisoned. I had a chance to escape in July. I'm glad I didn't, now, in hindsight. I'll get out one day. I swear!

Anyway, just back back from Matewan. I don't know what it is, but that little town always fills me with soothing vibes. I like to go there when I'm troubled, and confused about life. For some reason, Matewan makes me feel better. Maybe it's because it's such a tiny place, and it's on its last dying breath of life, or something. I'm glad it made me feel better tonight. I needed it, man! It was nice to see the stars on such a clear night, too. I was afraid I'd go all the way over there, and not feel anything (I didn't feel anything the last two times I went there. Some people just don't get it, I guess.)

Umm... It's funny when you think you have everything figured out, and then, come to find out, you don't! Like when... Oh, nevermind... But, let me just say, trust is not an easy thing to earn, with me...

And, for that matter, COLDPLAY, too. I've heard 3 or 4 Coldplay songs, and I love them all. Does that make me weird? Is it weird to like Coldplay, Gorillaz, and System of A Down? Hey, yeah! I like Aqualung, too! Ever heard Aqualung? Man, can that dude write songs! Aqualung. Yeah... I think Aqualung is my favorite! Music has sucked for too long! Like I said, ever since 1995, it's like they just quit trying, or something. But, over the last couple years, it's making a big comeback. I think. Does 4 good bands qualify as being a "big comeback?"

In related news, I'm going to see 3 Doors Down with Brother Roger, on November 6. I like 3 Doors Down, too. That should be big fun! It's been too long since I've got to hang out with Roger.

...Not only that, but I also like Gorillaz. Yeah... There! I said it! I've only heard two of their songs, actually... "Clint Eastwood," I think it's called, and "Feel Good Inc." And, let me tell you, these songs make me FEEL GOOD!!! Don't know why, really... I'm kinda serious about this, though. I think I'll buy a couple of their CDs. I've been putting it off for a while, because I know that every "new" band I've discovered since 1995 has let me down. I think I'm going to try Gorillaz out, man. It's not very often that good art comes along. When did System of a Down come along? 2001? Oh, okay. Nevermind.

Umm... Yeah, I still have 2 jobs. 3, if you count Ford. But, I'm on a leave of absense with him, so I guess that doesn't count.

Job 4

Okay... So, maybe I was wrong. MAYBE. I'm rarely wrong, by the way, but when I am, I'm man enough to admit it. I was WRONG, so wrong! Wrong on a couple matters, actually. But, today, I'm only going to discuss one with you (because I'm still just a LITTLE hopeful that I'm wrong about being wrong on the second matter...).

You might have noticed a strange darkness looming over my last few posts. Discussing work, and whatnot. Those of you with a keen eye, or those who know me, or whatever, probably thought, "Man, Junebug's not happy at all these days!" And, you would be right. It's this whole job-thing, you know? I got frustrated, working at the grocery store. I was there for 3 years, and I started thinking, "I don't want to work here for the rest of my life!" So, I went out, searching for a change. SOMETHING to clear my head. I think I was having a midlife crisis, or something. I jumped on the first job opening I saw. Magic Mart. I, obviously, wasn't happy there. I only stuck around for 16 days. So, I went to this office job. Thing is, I wasn't happy there, either. I felt nervous all the time, like I was on the verge of screwing up some important documents, or something. And, then there were times when I'd just sit there, for hours at a time, with nothing to do... The grocery store might have been a little aggravating sometimes, but I was happy there! I had benefits. I had a two-week, paid vacation. I had friends. I knew how to do my job! So... Thursday, I was sitting there at my desk, wondering, "What the crap am I going to do, man?! I can't go back to the store now. It's too late. I'd be starting all over again from the bottom of the ladder. Part time. No benefits. No vacations." Then, as if by a sign from God, the phone rang. It was my store "Brother," Steve!!! He, basically, asked if I was happy there, in my office, and stuff like that. Then, he said something VERY interesting: "You know, you can come back here (at the store). You've not been terminated yet. You can come back with your full benefits, vacation, and everything. It'd be like you never left." I told him I'd think about it. But, there was really nothing to think about. A "No-Brainer," as the yuppies say. I went to the store the next morning, and told Jenny (the office lady) not to send my termination papers in, because I'M COMING BACK! Everyone tried to tell me that I was making a huge mistake, by quitting the store. I just wouldn't listen. I had to find out the hard way. So... This created a delimma. What about my office job?! I, nervously, told my boss. It was clear that I was a broken man... I told him that I'd stick with him for a couple more weeks, until he finds a suitable replacement. I have a lot of respect for him, and he's been really good to me in the time I've been there, so I wouldn't have it any other way. Yes, that meant 2 more weeks of being miserable, and nervous, and whatnot, but it won't be so bad, because, in the mean time, I'm going to work at the store a couple days a week. Just to keep me in the payroll system, and stuff. So, I'm hoping the happiness of being back with my GROCERY STORE FAMILY will kinda balance out the depression of being in that office. My first day back at the grocery store was yesterday. It felt SO GOOD! Everyone had a million questions for me, as if I'd been away on some distant journey, or something. And, in a way, I was! I told Steve something, jokingly, about my experiences... But, I was actually dead serious, if that makes sense. Heh. I said, "I've been trying to find myself. Soul searching. I couldn't find me anywhere!" And, that's very true. I feel horrible about the office job, and I'm truly sorry for my boss there, because I wasn't the person he thought I could be. But, if you're not comfortable at a job after 2 weeks, there's a good chance you never will be, and you'll probably just make things worse by staying. So, I'm very sorry. It just didn't FEEL RIGHT. At the same time, I'm VERY grateful for Steve, and the folks at the store for giving me a second chance. I've never felt so good about going to work, as I did yesterday, at the store. Yeah, it's frustrating sometimes, but I didn't know just how good I had it there, until I left. I have a whole new appreciation for my job now. As I told my grocery store pals, yesterday, "I went out into the real world, and I didn't like it a bit." I'm HOME! So, what if I DO end up working there for the rest of my life? Well... Maybe that's not such a bad thing. It definitely beats the alternative!

I fought the law and the law won

Hey crew! Hey homies! How was your weekend? Mine was weird. But, it had a happy ending. Ummm... I guess I'll tell you about it from the start, huh?

Friday night, the official beginning of the weekend, was lame. I worked for Ford. That always sucks. He was watching the news when I first got there. I heard the news people talking about "Bridge Day 2005." I've been tempted to make the trek up to Fayetteville for the last couple years, just to see what all the hype is about. I did it again this year. The event started Saturday morning. I was itching to go, man. Then, I started thinking that the whole thing, Bridge Day, would be over-run with jocks. So, I didn't go again this year. I bet there was a lot of jocks there, though. I hate those guys! Supposedly, 200,000 people attended. Probably, like, 175,000 of them were jocks. I bet. I just bet! So, yeah, maybe next year... Kinda wish I would've went, now, looking back, in hindsight, and all...

My Saturday was really bad! I was on my way down to the floodwall for my evening walk. And... Well... Something very lame happened. I got a speeding ticket! Heh. Yeah, me! You read that right! Those of you who have road around with me know that I drive like a granny, and I always do the speed limit. But, for some dumb reason, I wasn't doing the speed limit Saturday. The cop clocked me in at 48 mph, in a 35 zone... I still say I was doing 46! Heh. And, well, the little turd gave me a TICKET. The only ticket I've ever got in my life! (A lot of firsts for me, this year....). He said he was just going to write me a "little citation." He gave me the ticket, told me to slow down and have a nice evening, and went on about his merry little way. I looked at the ticket, and saw... $335!!! Yes, THREE HUNDRED, THIRTY-FIVE DOLLARS!!! What is that crap?! I was a little mad, to say the least... Had I went to Bridge Day, I wouldn't have got that ticket.

Sunday was better, though. I took myself a little walk, just to clear my head. I walked up on the Hatfield and McCoy trail. I was questioning my place in the universe, and stuff... Thinking maybe that my goal in life should be to stand up against ABUSE OF POWER. What with my brush with the law, and my hatred for the power-mongers at Magic Mart, and the fact that I hate society's rules, and, and, and... But, then, I changed my tune. It sounded a lot like, "All You Need Is Love." Heh heh. Yeah, I remembered how artificial all that crap is, and how love is all that matters, so I changed my mind. I guess I'll just have to learn to live with society's rules for a while longer, because I don't feel like fighting. I just want to... Well, you know... Love...

Today was strange. It wasn't, technincally, the weekend, but I guess I should mention it. I got my notary public, today. Yeah... How weird is that? I had to be sworn in, and everything! So, if you have any important documents that need to be notarized, don't hesitate. I'm your huckleberry! Heh.

When I was little, everyone would ask me, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" My answer was always the same... "I don't know." They'd look at me, in disbelief, and then laugh nervously, and say, "Oh, you'll figure it out. You've got plenty of time." I still don't know what I want to be... And, I DON'T have plenty of time anymore...

I REALLY think I should persue this thing, you know? It's kinda eating away at me now. I felt this back in June, but I dropped it to chase a dream. Now may be the time to pick it back up.

Appreciate your concern, you'll always stink and burn... I'm not really mad. I'm just mad that everyone can see right through me. I used to be able to hide my emotions, you know? I'm a very private person. I like my pain to stay private. I don't like it when people see me crying.

Hey, is it me, or does System of a Down really rock? I'm really likin' 'em, man! They remind me so much of Faith No More it's silly. Faith No More were (and still are) one of my favorite bands, by the way. Really love the Faith No Mores!

Work tomorrow... Man... Wish I wasn't so weak, or else I'd fight the good fight myself. People shouldn't have to work! It's not right! I guess some people don't have to work, because of Columbus Day. Dad, you just don't know how lucky you are...

I'm going to bed. I have to work twice tomorrow, actually. Ford is back in the picture. What fun! So, I should rest. (But, since they're playing "Pretty Noose" on Octane right now, I'll stick around for a minute...) .

Slavery

Jim Morrison said it best. "You're all slaves! Letting people control you, and push you around!" It's so very true. I wish we had someone like that today, who could get the message across. It really doesn't seem fair at all to me. We work a third of our lives away. What is the point?! What does it accomplish?! Money?! Come on, man! Money isn't everything! Shake things up a little bit! Yeah... I make a good spokesperson, huh? All I've been posting about, lately, is my job... It's all so artificial, man! Society's rules are so screwed up! Why do we have to work?! That isn't what life is about at all! I've been screaming this to the top of my lungs for the last 10 years. It isn't that people don't believe me. They just need a little guidance. We need someone like Jim Morrison! Where are all the good rock stars? Why can't we have another John Lennon? Someone who's going to tell us the truth: "Love is all you need." It sucks!!! We go to work every morning, and do the same tired routine. Work, work, work... We look forward to the weekend. Two days off! No work for two days! What's the point?! We've just got to go right back Monday, and start the process all over again!

LOVE IS THE ANSWER!!!!!

NOT MONEY!!!!

END SLAVERY NOW!!!!

Wish I Would've Wrote This....

"Beside You In Time"

Nine Inch Nails

I am all alone this time around.

Sometimes on the sides I hear a sound.

Places parallel I know it's you.

Feel the little pieces bleeding through.

This goes on, and on, and on....

Now that I've decided not to stay.

I can feel me start to fade away.

Everything is back where it belongs.

I will be beside you before long.

This goes on, and on, and on...

We will never die.

Beside you in time.

------------

(It fits perfectly! I've been paying attention to a lot of lyrics, lately. I never was much on lyrics, actually. It was always about the music for me. But, sometimes I'll pick up on something, like "Beside You In Time," and I go, "Hey, wait a minute! That sounds like what I'm feeling!")

Let The Games Begin!

So, as you may have guessed by now, I've been on a bit of a quest, lately. A quest of self-improvement, and whatnot. So, after months, I finally have my head on straight again. I'm ready to take on the world. I think I'll probably win, too. But, that's besides the point. What is the point, you ask? Behold:















Maybe you're wondering, "What the crap is that thing, Junebug?" Well, then, I'll tell you. That thing is what's going to bring Cruel Music back to life! That thing is a digital recorder, the likes of which is used to record MUSIC. Professional-sounding music! Onto Cds, even! My very own portable studio, if you will. As I said before, I've been writing a lot of new songs, but I've not been recording very many, because my recording abilities are limited. Well, NOT ANYMORE! I bought this baby on Ebay, last night. So, in about a week, it'll be in my hands. In about a week, it'll be put to use. In a little longer than a week, you'll be seeing some new MUSIC available at Cruel Music! Exciting, no?

Day 3 (Again!)

Hello. How is your day going? I'm doing much better, thank you. I had a couple bad days there, man. It's hard, you know? It's hard when everything is put on hold, right while the pieces are starting to fall into place. It's just plain hard. Hopefully the dark days are almost over. Hopefully. Anyway... That's not why you called.

I'm currently at work. Yeah, really. Blogging the day away. Kinda. I mean, if you can squeeze 8 hours into the 15 minutes it takes to post this blog, then I'd be blogging the day away. It's boring, though. That's what I'm getting at. So far the highlight of my day has been the last game of Solitaire that I just played. I almost won! I only had, like, 3 cards left. I needed a break from the excitement, so here I am. Bored out of my skull. It's not a bad job. Don't get me wrong. It's just that the lady who used to occupy this seat left, after 13 years, out of the blue. She didn't leave us anything to work with here! We're starting over from scratch. And, until we get things back into some sort of operating condition, this is how it's going to be, I guess. Here I sit... At an old Gateway computer, with Windows 98, and a really slow dial up connection. Very primitive. The web browsers have never been updated, so I can't even surf the web! It's hard to work under these conditions! I kid you not, man! It's weird. I can't even get my blog to load! I'm hoping this partial web page display will be good enough to get my message across... I can't check my Hotmail. I can't look around on Ebay. Nothing! I'm very tempted to buy Windows XP, and throw it on this dinosaur. Yeah, it'll erase everything on the computer, but what good is "everything" to me?! I might as well have something here that I can work with, right? Think I'll bring that up at the next board meeting. Oh, wait... I'm sorry, there is no "board." It's just me and my boss here. Heh.

Okay...

I got another job offer today. A graphic designer. Sounds fun, and all, but I'm tired of changing jobs. I think I'm done now. I've worked at 3 different places in the last 3 weeks! That sucks!

New job... I'm an office manager, which is basically a glorified secretary. I think I like it. Maybe. Who knows?! It's weird to just sit still all day. In an office. Behind a desk. I could, like, totally decorate my desk with pictures of my grandchildren, and stuff. Heh. Yeah... Maybe. It's fun to be crazy! Anyway... I'm alone at this job. I just sit there, and answer the phone every once in a while. It's good. I need to be alone. I need to think. I need to get my head clear. I need to plot my next move. I need to make sense of what has happened to me over the summer. Do I like the job? Ummm.... Maybe. The office is hooked up on a really slow dial-up internet service. How did we ever live like that? I hate that! I guess it's good, though. It keeps me focused on my job, instead of surfing the net.

I just got a call from Magic Mart. Well... My mom answered it, but anyway... It was weird, huh? They seemed to be wondering where I was, or something... Heh. I didn't give a notice! I just didn't show up for the last 2 days. Mom told the female dog, "I believe he quit." I saw one of the managers from Magic Mart in a Chinese restaurant today (Yes... God help us, I'm eating Chinese food now! I'll eat, basically, anything now!). It was just like in the movies! I was trying to hide from him. Crawling around on the floor, and holding the menu up against my face, and stuff... It was funny! Kinda think he saw me anyway, though, or else why would Magic Mart be calling for me? ("Fell On Black Days" is on Octane right now!) I want to feel bad about leaving Magic Mart the way I did, but that place really sucks man! I don't owe them anything! And, if you're a spy from Magic Mart, viewing this right now, you should quit too! The management there sucks! I thought the store was bad... Wow.... So, yeah, I'm not going to mention the name of the office where I'm working now, because I'm afraid Magic Marters will hunt me down, and scalp me, or something...

Typing Skills

I figured that I should probably brush up on my typing a bit, since I'm, basically, a secretary, now. I used to type, like, 35 words a minute, in high school. I think, now, I can type about 8 words a minute. Heh. I don't know what happened to me... So, I'm going to ramble a bit now.

My aunt "10" is goofy. She's been wanting me to go back to the grocery store ever since I quit. My dad, too, actually. Dad wants me to go back, because I had insurance. 10 won't really say why she wants me to go back. She just constantly says, "You miss your store, don't you, honey?" And, "I believe you want to go back to the store." Stuff like that. Weird... I called her a few minutes ago. The first thing she said, when I told her I quit Magic Mart, was, "Are you going back to the store?" Crazy old woman!

A secretary... Hey, you know what's neat about this? My first day of working at Kmart was on October 4, 2001. Well, my first day at this real estate agency will be on October 4, 2005. Heh.

I take "10" to get her groceries every Thursday. Well, almost every Thursday, we'll get on the scales at Wal Mart, just to see how much weight we've been gaining. The neat thing about Wal Mart's scales is that you get your fortune read afterward. Sure, the fortune usually says something like, "Go on a diet," or "Happiness is the key to life," or something useless. Well... Last Thursday, after I got weighed, my fortune said, "You will find a better job." WHAT?! How do you know?! I didn't even tell you I was looking for a better job, man! Freaky... Same thing with this week's TV Guide. My fortune said something like, "Things are finally starting to go your way. Don't get too cocky, but remain optimistic." As if the TV Guide knew what I wrote in my last blog (the one about being pessimistic). Weird, man...

I don't know... I could just type anything, you know? Just something to kinda work on my speed, or something... But, I can't really think of anything. My life just isn't very exciting. So... This is my day off. I'll be around all day. Wanna hang out, or something?

Oh, here's another beach picture. This was an out-take from the photo album. I stand by these signs on the beach, every year, and Mom takes a picture of me there. I was going for it again this year. I was standing there, smiling, forever. It would've been a good picture, if Mom would've just snapped the freakin' picture! Anyway, I thought she got the picture, after about 2 minutes, so I stopped my pose... Then, she took the picture! D'oh! But, my point is... Look how sad I was!

A Couple With My Dad

Beach Pix - Part Two

Oh, Wow!

Strange days, indeed, baby! Something weird happened to me. Right after that last post, I got an email from the job service, saying there was a job opening at a local real estate agency. So, I went to the office, gave them my resume, and got the job! Heh heh. I'll be doing OFFICE WORK! Working a fixed schedule every day! 8:30-5, with weekends, and holidays off. Wow! The kind of job I've always wanted! I'm a little afraid, though. Sounds a little too good to be true. I'm pessimistic by nature. Things usually just don't go my way, man! There must be a catch to it... I don't know... But, I got the job! I start tomorrow. They gave me a key to the office, and everything. Killer! So, I went to the grocery store, and told my friends there the good news. I'm supposed to work at Magic Mart at 1:30, today... Steve said that I should just not show up. Not call, or anything. Just take the day off. And, you know what? That sounds really good! I've not had a day off since the 22nd. I've been working really hard at Magic Mart. Rest sounds awesome! So, that's what I'm going to do! Heh heh. I worked at Magic Mart for 16 days. I didn't really make any friends there. The managers all suck... Abuse of power... So, they can just bite me! I don't want anything to do with them anymore! I'm going to keep my cool name badge, though.

Beach Pix - Part One

These are from August. Kinda new, huh?














This is where we stayed. Home Sweet Sea Cabin.





































(Touching a cactus. Oww!)

Ummm...

I was thinking last night, before I went to bed, that I had something really cool to say on the blog. I was kinda sleepy, though, and just went to bed, hoping to blog today. Well, turns out that I forgot what I was going to blog. Go figure!

I got me a cool, new printer / scanner / other stuff, Saturday. So, I'll be posting new pictures up here soon. Actually... Take this with you!











Really proud of my Magic Mart name badge. Heh. So, yeah, look for new pictures on the web site, and here, too, I guess. There's not much else to do, these days, so I'll probably be doing a lot of scanning. Especially since the newest pictures on the website are from 2001. That should be updated.

Chosen Paths

So, do you ever catch a glance of someone from your past, and start thinking? I saw a few of those people in Magic Mart, tonight.

I saw Jeff, my best friend in high school. He was with his wife, and their son. That kind of thing used to be depressing to me. "Look at that! He's happy! Why can't I be happy?!" Or, "Everyone I went to school with is married, and have families now. What about me?!" Yeah... That's not me anymore... Good seeing Jeff, man! We go way back... Golly, 17 years! I've known him since before I had long hair! We met in 7th grade. I started growing my hair in the summer between 7th and 8th grade. Not many people have seen me with short hair, but Jeff has! Heh. I'm really proud of Jeff, and all he's done. I wish we wouldn't have parted ways. He'd be a good person to be in me life right now. I guess that's life, though. "Hearts and thoughts they fade, fade away." People come and go. Every once in a while, some will stay. Jeff, if you're reading this, by any chance, let's be friends again! I miss you, Brother. We had some great times together! I never had many friends. Still don't. Jeff was one of the few, the proud.

Secondly, I saw an old crush of mine. The girl from 2000 (cm). The one who got away. I was so crazy about her! I wish I wouldn't have been too shy to have asked her out. We could've had some good times together. She was with her boyfriend, tonight. She smiled, and waved at me, as if to say, "This could've been YOU with me, Junebug!" Oh well...

And last, I saw Todd. He used to work at Kmart with me. He was one of the first people to take me under his wing, and teach me the ropes there. So, he was in Kmart's old building, which is now Magic Mart. Full Circle.

Three sightings. The paths that led me to where I am today. There seems to be a lot of crossroads on the path I'm currently on. I never know from one day to the next where I'm going to end up.

Got my first Magic Mart pay check, today. Turns out that was a good move, after all. I'll be getting, like, $50 more a week. Still looking for something better, though.

Magic Mart plays Sirius radio all the time, by the way. Don't think I mentioned that before. They finally turned off the country channel, yesterday. But, now they're on the 70's channel. Hey, don't get me wrong, 70's rock is the best! But, the thing is, there was a lot of disco in the 70's... I heard a lot of Donnna Summer, and Bee Gees, yesterday.

I'm Lovin' This!

It's so cool to be a creature of the day again! Or, night, too, I guess... I'm working from 1-9 most of the time. I'm getting to enjoy plenty of daylight. Then, when I get off work, I usually go down to the floodwall, and do some night walking / star gazing. Good stuff, man!

Just watched the new Foo Fighters' video, "DOA." If you've not seen it yet, you should! Go to www.foofighters.com and click on media. I love all the Foo's videos. This one is really funny. Go! Be gone with you!

New Band?!?!

So, I'm sure you've noticed that there seems to be a lack of music in Cruel Music, nowadays. I can't even begin to remember when the last musical piece was released (according to the catalog, it was on November 3, 2002!!!) It's been a while, to say the least! I don't know what went wrong, man. My lack of free time killed my desire to make music. But, I've, suddenly, become inspired to write songs again. A lot of them are wimpy, little, "silly love songs." But, "What's wrong with that? I'd like to know. So, here we go again..." Yeah... Anyway, as it turns out, I know this bass player... So, kids, my gears are turning. I'm feeling very creative again, all of a sudden, and I think I might just have myself a bassist (and a singer?). Well... It's just a theory, right now. Just in the beginning stages. It'll probably be, like, a year, or something before you'll be hearing any new music from this band. But, just keep that in mind. It COULD happen! Heh. Oh, and I've recorded a couple songs on my own, by the way... Don't know where they'll end up, but they're on my computer right now. Maybe I'll make a new solo album, while we're waiting for this new band to form. Either way, there's got to be some MUSIC in Cruel Music! It's been too long!

Homecoming!

So... Day 5, I guess... Magic Mart is kinda weird. I don't think I'll stick around long. I mentioned that being in Kmart's old building would be like "coming home," for me. Well... Picture this... You go home one day, and find that "home" isn't anything like it was the last time you were there. The house is a different color, all of the furniture is different, and your family isn't there. Just a bunch of people you've never seen before in your life. But, this is something I had to do! It's like bungee jumping, or something. You'll never know what you're missing, if you don't jump. I needed out of the grocery store. I needed to prove that I wasn't afraid anymore. I needed to show the world that I can make a leap of faith when, and if, I decide to.

I've been changin,' but you'll never see me now...

I like that song. Don't know who it is. They play it on Octane all the time, but I've been listening to Left Of Center, lately. Weird music kinda fits in with my weird mood. Been listening to Nine Inch Nails a lot, too. Like, every day when I walk, I have some kind of NIN cd with me. I think I had "Pretty Hate Machine" every day last week. Awesome CD! Yeah, anger is cool... That cd helped me to realize that I'm angry.

So... Breaking news! I guess this would be a Cruel Music exclusive, since no one seems to like me anymore, and no one calls, or anything... So, here goes: I quit my job at the grocery store!!! Woo hoo, man!!! Liberation!!! Freedom!!! I'm working at Magic Mart (that's a low-budget, redneck version of Wal Mart, for those of you who don't know), now. Today was my second day. Yes, the job sucks almost as much as the grocery store did, but, hey, at least it's not the grocery store!!! GAWD, that was the worse job I've ever had in my life! I still can't believe I wasted 3 years of my life there! There were a lot of good people at the grocery store. I would almost consider them as being friends, if I only had friends... I'm going to miss them a lot. They taught me a lot about myself. I grew a lot there. But, I stopped growing, and it wasn't fun anymore. I hated being there more and more every day. So, that's how you know to get out of a job... More money, or any of that crap, isn't going to make you happy when you hate the job. Magic Mart seems like it'll give me some growth. We're moving the store up to my old Kmart store. It'll seem like going home, to me. Kmart was the coolest job ever!

Oh, happy birthday, Dad!

Audio Slaves

I ordered a book on Ebay, a couple weeks ago. Well, I thought it was a book. Turns out it was an AUDIO BOOK. I was kinda mad, at first. "What's this crap?!" I was going to send it back, but then I had a change of heart. I opened it up, and started listening to it. Turns out that audio books are the greatest inventions ever! I mean, who has time to READ? I know I sure don't! It takes me, like, 6 months to read a book. But, with this cool little audio book thing, I got it over with on the same day I got it in the mail, yesterday. So, for those of you who "dis" audio books, and say they're cheating, or whatever, you should give it a try sometime. Audio books rule, man!!!

Fashion Sense

Back to that beard thing, which I mentioned in the last post. I shaved about a week ago. The women I work with are all mad at me now, as a result. They keep saying that I looked good with a beard. That was kinda strange. A woman has never told me I look good, in the 29 years I've been here. Even more strange, the men are glad that I shaved. As if they were intimidated by me, or something. Heh.

So, if you know me, you know that I've never followed trends in my life. Never. It's just not my thing. Everyone says, "Cut your hair, you hippy! Long hair isn't in style anymore!" And, that's exactly why I have long hair! If everyone else had long hair, I'd cut mine. I don't want anything to do with trends. (It's funny, though, because I kinda look trendy right now, with my shaggy, short-like hair. That was not my intention. I just wanted my hair to all be the same length again.) Also, you may have noticed, almost every guy in America has a goatee right now. You'll never see me in a goatee, because of that fact.

Anyway, what I'm getting at is my beard, or lack thereof. The popular vote seems to be "Grow your beard back, Junebug!!!" So, I think what I'll do is, I'll grow my beard back. Kinda tease all the women with it long enough to shave it off again! I don't care what people think of me. I don't care if they think I'm "cute" with a beard. I don't care if they think I "look dirty." I'm not going to follow their rules. I'm not going to try to please anyone. I'm going to stir people up, as I've always done. So... The last time I shaved was Tuesday night. Let's annoy people again! It's fun!

Back With A Vengeance (And A Beard)

I made my triumphant return to Chatty, last night, around 6:00. I didn't shave the whole time I was there. I was, originally, protesting my being in Myrtle Beach, and was going to shave when I got back to WV. But, I got used to the attention I was getting, so I decided to keep the beard for a while longer. I've never had a beard before. It's kinda fun.

As for the big, much-hyped, WDN video... Well, it didn't happen! "Reporters On The Beach" was cancelled. The tenth edition, last year, will likely be the last time you'll hear the title "Reporters On The Beach." There will be no "Reporters On The Beach 11." I apologize to the fans, but it's been obvious, for the last few years, that "ROTB" had lost its magic, and was no longer interesting, either to you, or me. This was not planned. It just happened... But... This is not the end of WDN. It's just the end of a segment of WDN. WDN will probably live forever.

Fans of Cruel Music will be pleased to hear that, although there was no "Reporters On The Beach 11" video, there WAS a video! And, it's going to become a staple of Cruel Music... Introducing: "Junebugg Fewget." This new adventure will be a combination of everything you've ever saw, or heard, from Cruel Music, in it's 13-year history. As the title might suggest, it's just me. Me recording music, or, in the case of this year's Myrtle Beach trip, me making videos. The video that was completed in Myrtle Beach is titled, "Junebugg Fewget's Big, Wild 2005 Myrtle Beach Vacation." It's hard to describe, actually... It's similar to WDN, in that it involves humor. But, I think the best definition of this tape would be a "visual blog." It was a lot of fun to make, and I think you'll be seeing a lot more of this kind of thing in the future... Hope you enjoy!

Myrtle Beach, Here I Come!!!

So, I'm heading to Myrtle Beach, tomorrow, ready or not! Hopefully, I'll find myself there, and bring me back to Chattaroy. Kinda not looking forward to the vacation. I don't feel good about it. Bad vibes, man! It'd suck if I die, or something. Bummer. "Life was just beginning, for young Junebug." Yeah... That would suck! I was just starting to get the hang of life. Umm... If I do die, though, I apologize for leaving so soon.

Anyway, hoping to do lots of crazy stuff for WDN, while I'm in Myrtle Beach. It's been too long since I was crazy... And, I'm kinda feeling crazy now, so that would fit the mood. WDN... "Reporters On The Beach 11," we're calling it. And, when I say "we're," I mean "I'm." That's kinda the way things have been at Cruel Music, in recent years. I'm all alone, as with life... But, hey, I'm happy, so bite me! Just me, Mom, and Dad are going this year. Shouldn't be very crowded... Hey, maybe I'll drag Mom and Dad into the video thing. It's always fun to annoy the crap out of them, especially Dad, because he gets so mad.

We got 2 pretty good mud slides, this morning, from the insane rain. That's going to be fun to clean up when I get back.

Hey, kids, kill your hair!!!

I forgot to mention this, the other day... I cut, pretty much, every bit of my hair off, Thursday. As you'll recall, I gave myself a mullet, back in October. Well, turns out that wasn't such a good idea. Go figure! So, I wanted to let it grow back. Only problem with that was that it looked really weird. My hair has not been all one length since 2003, when it started falling out. I kept it all one length for about 5 years, and I kinda liked it that way, until I went bald. So, now, thanks to modern technology, I'm not bald anymore. I wanted my hair to be all the same length again, so I made it that way. And, as a result, my hair is the shortest length that it's been for 16 years right now. It's short, man! It doesn't even touch my chin. Most people seem to like it this way, but let me tell you, it really sucks... I'll be letting it grow down to my buttocks after this ordeal.

Please help Chris!!!

I met this guy, Chris Dodson, today. Please take a moment to read his story, here... He is a peaceful, loving guy. What has happened to him is totally uncalled for:

National Coal Company (NCC) is a new corporation currently engaging in MTR
in Tennessee, and having bought and continuing to buy permits for
continued mining through out the entire coal bearing part of the state. On
June 7th I travelled from WV to support my friends in Tennessee's efforts
to stop this company from moving in.

About thirty of us paid a visit to NCC's first ever share-holders meeting
at a holiday inn in west knoxville. Our intent was to march into the
hallway and drum and chant with a few breaks in the music for individuals
to make statements about surface mining in TN.

I was at the back of the group as marched in, so i didn't realize this had
happened until sometime later, but apparently two of our people, against
our declared mission, pushed their way into the conference room and were
consequently assaulted by a police officer who was gaurding the meeting
and a coal company exec. a brief struggle ensued including the cop and
coal exec putting these people in submission holds and choke-holds before
they were forced out of the doorway and it was closed with the cop
standing outside, facing all of us.

We continued to drum and chant (bear in mind i didn't know that the
struggle had happened) for maybe twenty minutes. During that time i made
my way to the front of the crowd where i stood and drummed and chanted for
the remainder of the action. you can see a picture on the MJS website of
me holding a fifty-gallon barrel lid with "NO MTR" written on it.
(actually, you can't see me because my head is behind the lid) this was my
action.

after a while we were asked to leave and we went outside and reassembled.
as we were standing there, the first activist was arrested while
attempting to talk with the police. then we were asked to leave
altogether and we began to. as i was walking off of the hotel property, i
was g! rabbed from behind and arrested. (i asked the officer why i was being arrested and he said, "because i want to")

some time later police traveled to a strip mall parking lot across the
street where one action-participant was getting into his car to go home.
he was arrested at that time and three of us were taken to jail.

our arresting officer didn't sign our warrants for about ten hours after
our arrests, forcing us to stay incarcerated for an unneccesary long-time.

the evening of my arrest at about ten o'clock we went before the
magistrate. having though that we were being charged with disorderly
conduct or something similar, we discovered at this time that our charges
were much more serious. i am charged with aggravted assault, aggravated
riotting, burglary and disrupting a public meeting or procession.

We spent two and a half days in maximum security on 23 hour lock-down
before our friends could raise the exorbitant amount of money nrequired
for bail.

we have video footage, still photos, witnesses and a history of
non-violence on our side. we're going to be o.k. these charges are
completely ridiculous and false and we have more than enough evidence to
prove it.

of course, this is a stressfull time for my family and myself (my family
moreso than myself) and thsuly prayer is thing number one. i do ask that
anyone who has any practice of focused energy, whether it be prayer or
otherwise, keep this situation in mind.

thing number two is activate. Mountain Top Removal is destroying
appalachia. it kills all life in the earth's most biologically diverse
temperate forest. it displaces communities and threatens those that cannot
afford to leave with flash floods and mudslides off of the barren
mine-sites. overwieght coal trucks have killed fifty people in the last
four years. it is industry standard to overload the trucks, this is not a
problem of "bad drivers". it's a matter of "oh you won't let us overlo! ad
your truck? well you're fired! we can find someone who will let us
overload the truck." MTR is destroying what makes life possible and
desirable in appalachia. the spiritual sanctity of these mountains is
destroyed. people's lives are destroyed. the earth is raped. and it is all
for the profit of a very few.
this must stop and we must stop it. one of the greatest things that
happens when an activist goes to jail, is that people who know that
activst, or know someone who knows that activist, wake up and join the
fight, having seen how important and injust the situation. join the fight!

thing number three is money. legal defense is a long process and it costs
dollars. we need money. checks should be made out to mountain justice
summer with "legal defense" in the memo line and mailed to
p.o. box 86
Naoma WV 25140.

Reporters On The Beach

I am quite pleased to announce the announcement of "Reporters On The Beach 11!" This week of fun will begin on August 20, in Myrtle Beach, SC. More details will be posted on this topic, sooner or later. The fact is, details are kinda sketchy right now.

Is It Still 2004?

I'm having a hard time accepting that this is 2005. I don't know why. You know how you'll goof, and put the wrong year on things whenever you date them for the first few days of the new year? Then, you'll remember, and kinda laugh at yourself, and say, "Oh, yeah, it's not that year anymore! Har har har!!!" Well... This year is almost halfway over, and I still think it's 2004! I still refer to 2003 as "last year." I still date my letters, and other important documents, as "2004." I stopped laughing at myself a long time ago... I'm worried now. In an interesting twist, I DO understand that I'm 29 years old. It's just the year thing, man! Is there some sort of therapy, or something that I can go in for on this kind of thing? I'm well aware of the fact that time seems to pass faster the older we get. Years go by very quickly. Why can't I get over this thing? Someone, please, help me!!!

New Chatters!

FINALLY!!! A new episode of "Chatters" is up for your viewing enjoyment. You can find a link for said episode right about here. The story of this episode goes back a few years... 1998, I'm thinking... '97, maybe, but probably '98... Or, was that '96? Heh heh. It's based on the first "Reporters On The Beach" in Florida... Ahh, this just in, my sources tell me that it was, in fact, 1998! Good memory, huh? So... Back in 1998, the running joke of the week was the word "Hostel." Timmy and Ryan saw a hostel the year before, and we were making fun of that word for, like, the next 3 years, as we tended to do back then. Anyway... This episode features "WDN2" trying to figure out what the crap that word actually means, in a posting board over at Hostels.com. I actually posted my questions back in April, and I'm just starting to get responses out of the post. Long time coming on that one!

On a side note, you'll notice that the main Chatters page is undergoing some much-needed matainance. Hopefully, it'll look a little less cluttered, and a little more readable, when I get done with it. Enjoy!

Quote Of The Day

Steve: "It looks like you have a tumor on the side of your car."
Junebug: "It's not a tumuh!!!"

(We were talking about my Sirius satellite antenna. I just bought it today. It's pretty cool. You should get one! We had to stick the antenna to the side of my car, because the magnetic thingy wouldn't stick on my Mustang's trunk lid... Which reminds me...)

Quote of the Day II:
Steve: "I told you not to buy a Ford! This thing's got a plastic trunk on it!"

(Today was fun...)

Spam

Remember when spam was something that we actually enjoyed... It was a tastey beef bi-product, of some sort, and it was sold in those cool / fun blue cans...

I've seen it all now! Blogger.com has become some sort of haven for spammers. I like to browse around Blogger from time to time, and see if any other souls are as disturbed as mine. So, after my last post, I decided to do such browsing. I'm kinda pissed, because all I could find, when hitting the "next blog" button, was spam! Sad, people. Sad.

My Favorite Rejections

As you all know, I've been on a quest to find love for quite some time now. I started out the conventional way, by just asking girls out. I didn't have any luck there, so I turned to online dating services. Wouldn't you know it, I didn't have any luck there either, so I've come full-circle, and started asking again. Still no luck... But, I figured I shouldn't let this sort of thing get me down. So, I've decided to amuse myself by collecting girls' excuses. Now, here is a collection of some of my all-time favorite rejections:

* "I've got to go to the library."
* "I don't have time."
* "I have a boyfriend."
* "I can't. I'm getting ready to move to Huntington."
* "You're too old for me."
* "You're too young for me (this particular girl ended up seeing one of my former friends, who is 4 years YOUNGER than me. Go figure, eh?)."

And, then, there were two girls who didn't even give any excuses:

* One girl said yes, and acted like she wanted to go out with me, but when I went to pick her up, she ran away from me! True story.
* And finally, and probably the most painful one ever, was the one who was a friend for, like, a year and a half, but just stopped talking to me (and pretending like she didn't even know me!) after I asked her out.

So, yeah... It sucks to be me. I've yet to find a girl who has the guts to just come right out, and tell me the truth, though: "You're a hideous freak, and I wouldn't go out with you if you were the last man on the planet!" So, here's my challenge. If I ever hear that response (the truthful one), I will give the girl who says it $1,000 cash.

Sticky Situation

You may recall that I've been looking for a new job for the last few months. Not having a bit of luck with that. But... An interesting proposal came forth, last week (a week ago, today, actually). My old Kmart pal, Eddie, asked if I'd like to get a job with him at the movie theater. And, that would be awesome, if it wasn't a minimum wage job. One of the reasons I'm trying to get out of the grocery store is that the pay sucks, so it would be kinda dumb to quit for a job that pays even less than the grocery store. But... What about working at the movie theater part-time, while not working at the grocery store? That seems like a possibility! But, I'm afraid I'd be really tired, and whatnot. I mean, I stay tired all the time, as it is! But, dude, the job would be SIMPLE! Not to mention, I'd be working with some of my old Kmart crew again. And that, to me, would be worth being tired for! Heh heh. Seriously, though, those guys are great, and I REALLY DO want to try it out. I've been thinking about it all week. In weighing the positives against the negatives, there's no question about it, the positives are victorious! But... I've gotta make up my mind by tomorrow, and let Eddie and the guys know for sure. Difficulties...

Allergies: A New Fad

I've officially sold out! I've jumped on a bandwagon, for the first time in my life. Let me tell you, I couldn't be more thrilled to be a part of this little fad. It's the coolest thing I've ever been a part of in my 29 years here. It's a neat little thing called: Allergies (or would that be neat THINGS?). Every time I go for a walk, I start sneezing, my throat itches, and my eyes swell up! Heh heh. I tried to sell the product, you know? "Allergies: Try some today!" Maybe that'll do it... So, yeah... What's the deal with these crazy allergies?! I didn't have any allergies at all when I was a kid. It started when I was, like, 18. It get a little more unbearable every year. Actually, I don't remember having allergies last year... But, man, do they suck this year! I wouldn't wish this on my worse enemy. (Do I have any enemies? Hmmm... Have to get back to you on that one...)

My Profile...

Back to those online dating services... I changed my profile (only on Yahoo! Personals, so far). Maybe this will turn a few heads:


i'm tall, and skinny. i have long hair, and crooked teeth. i'm hideous to look at. i gave up on trying to find love a long time ago. basically, i'm just looking for a "partner in crime," so to say. i love rock music. i hate country, and r&b/rap. if you like either country, or r&b/rap, don't even waste your time, or mine. i hate rich people. if you're rich, don't worry, because i hate most people, in general. i love life. real life, that is... not most people's idea of life, which rotates around work, consumerism, and money. i hate money. i hate the way the powers-that-be control people, and force us to work in order to "live." i hate that people have to waste two-thirds of their lives working. i hope to, one day, infiltrate the system, and change their rules, but until that day i have to play along. i love art. i have never watched a "reality" tv show in my life, but i know that i hate such shows, because they're artificial, and they contribute to everything that is wrong with the world. i hate sports for the same reason. i love to walk, and spend as much time as possible outdoors, enjoying (real) life.

New WDN? (!?)

Hey y'all! I've been rambling on the blog, lately, and haven't really been mentioning the topic at hand -- Cruel Music. I mean, that's why we're all here, right? Sure, of course, whatever... Well... I have a scoop. A big scoop! The scoop of the century, maybe! Honestly! It's been nearly a year since we've produced any sort of Cruel Music. But, all of that is about to change! A new WDN video will be coming out shortly! But, it's going to be in the obsolete VHS format, sadly. Sorry! That whole thing with recording on DVDs didn't quite pan out. I hope to fix that soon... But, the big news here is ***NEW WDN*** Not sure when, exactly, but it'll be soon (soon, I tell you!). I just have to take the time to edit everything. It should be, roughly, 2 hours in length. Most of it was recorded last year, and, to be honest, I don't even know what's on there. I seem to remember some footage of the big mudslide, and more crazy stuff with 10, and Joyce Gail... The usual...

Notice:

Don't look now, but I think rock music may be trying to make a comeback! No, really, this time! There's new CDs by Queens Of The Stone Age and Nine Inch Nail out right now, and next month will be Foo Fighters and The White Stripes. And, sometime soon there's going to be a new Pearl Jam CD... Haven't heard the release date for that one yet. You? But, anyway, you should run out and buy the new QOTSA and NIN right this minute, if you haven't already, because they're both great.

Funny Forward From Roger

I want to thank all of you who have taken the time and trouble to send
me your damn chain letters over the past two years.

Thank you for making me feel safe, secure, blessed, and wealthy. Because of your concern...

I no longer can drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the people who make these
products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer drink anything out of a can because I will get sick from the
rat feces and urine.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer.
I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be
pricked with a needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a
water buffalo on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
perfume sample and rob me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French and don't support our
American troops.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a
stupid number for which I will get the phone bill from hell with calls
to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers.

I no longer date the opposite sex because they will take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my
free replacement pair from Nike. !

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out for me and St. Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I
forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five
minutes.

(Jeeze, the BIBLE did not mention it works that way!)

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl who is
about to die in the hospital (for the 1,387,258th time).

I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive
the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in
their special e-mail program.

Yes, I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for looking out for me!

I will now return the favor.

If you don't send this e-mail to at least 1200 people in the next 60
seconds, a large bird with diarrhea will crap on your head at 5:00 PM
this afternoon and the fleas of a thousand camels will infest your
armpits. I know this will occur because it actually happened to a
friend of a friend of a friend ! of a friend of a friend of a friend of a
friend of my next door neighbor's ex-mother-in-law's 8th husband's 2nd cousin's 3rd husband's ex-wife's mother's beautician!!!

Curls

It's weird... My hair has been known to do some crazy things, in the 16 years that its been long. It's changed colors (blonde in the summer, and almost black in the winter), it all fell out in 2003, etc... But, its latest activity is that it's getting curly. Yeah... Curly! What's that crap all about?! My hair has always been straight, no matter what style or color it is. Oh well... At least I have hair now. I don't really care what it looks like, as long as it's there!

Back To The Old Drawing Board...

Oh well... So, I got this letter, today. It said that I didn't get that cool job, with the state, that I've been talking about. They've hired someone else. They sent a letter?! What's up with that?! Couldn't tell me in person?! Oh well... Everything happens for a reason... I'm still going to try to escape the clutches of the grocery store, though.

This makes me angry, too... Remember how I'm signed up with several of those online dating sites? Yeah, I'm still there... Can't seem to get a date on my on, and need an extra little nudge from online dating companies... Well, I've stated on every one of these profile things that I'm seeking someone close to home, someone in the area, ya know? So, why is it that I keep getting emails from these chicks that live miles away, in other states?! Pretty much every state, but the two I'm looking for!!! I mean, don't get me wrong, I like the attention, and all, but I don't want to drive 4,000 miles every time I want to take my chick out to the movies, or something. Sheesh!

Dumb Web Pages... Chapter 3

Hey, look what I found!

"M.C. Snot Rag- Nobody is sure what M.C. Snot Rag's actual name is. M.C. Snot Rag is a very rough character who simply oozes fear, awe, and a sense of foreboding from every pore in his body. Once in second grade the teacher asked M.C. Snot Rag to turn in his homework and he responded by eating her VW Bug in it's entirety, including the spare tire. M.C. Snot Rag got an "A+" that year and every year thereafter, while only attending class twice. Since nobody is entirely sure what specific sinister dealings M.C. Snot Rag is up to, most people in the county drive by his house once a week and throw some money out onto the lawn just to be safe. Dream- To learn to correctly spell Mississippi."

Not quite sure what that's all about...

Shedding Some Light On Dark Matters

Okay... A while back I mentioned something that I was cooking up, that was a bit of a secret. The cat's out of the bag, now. And, now that I think about it, it was kinda dumb for making it a secret, and pretending like it was some kind of big deal. I went to the state capital, last month, to take a civil service test, because I'm trying to get a better job... Yeah... As cool as it may seem, the grocery store sucks! I've got to get out of there, man! Don't get me wrong, I love the people I work with. They've grown on me, and I'm proud to say that they're my friends. That's why I kept it a secret that I was looking for another job, actually, because I was afraid my friends at there would get the wrong idea, or something. So, I went to the capital, that time, and got lost, and stuff. Then, I went to another town, and took the test. Well... As a result of that, I had a job interview, last Wednesday. And... Well... I still haven't heard anything from the new job. I'm waiting. Patiently. Wondering what to do. Should I call them, and see what's going on, or wait a little while longer? I don't know! But, if I get the job, it'll be awesome, because they get weekends and holidays off... Unlike the grocery store, where the employees have to work HARDER on weekends and holidays. So, yeah, I really hope the new place calls me soon, or something, because I'd really love to have this new job!

Forward...

(This is a forwarded email that I got from "Hubby." I've held on to it since Feb. 13. His internet went down not long after that, so this is one of the last bits of communication I had with him. He didn't write this, but he liked it, and sent it to me. Now, I'm sending it out for anyone who wants to read it here.)

=================

THE OLD MAN AND THE DOG


"Watch out! You nearly broad sided that car!" My father yelled at me. "Can't you do anything right?"

Those words hurt worse than blows. I turned my head toward the elderly man in the seat beside me, daring me to challenge him. A lump rose in my throat as I averted my eyes. I wasn't prepared for another battle.

"I saw the car, Dad. Please don't yell at me when I'm driving."

My voice was measured and steady, sounding far calmer than I really felt. Dad glared at me, then turned away and settled back.

At home I left Dad in front of the television and went outside to collect my thoughts. Dark, heavy clouds hung in the air with a promise of rain. The rumble of distant thunder seemed to echo my inner turmoil. What could I do about him?

Dad had been a lumberjack in Washington and Oregon. He had enjoyed being outdoors and had reveled in pitting his strength against the forces of nature. He had entered grueling lumberjack competitions, and had placed often. The shelves in his house were filled with trophies that attested to his prowess. The years marched on relentlessly. The first time he couldn't lift a heavy log, he joked about it; but later that same day I saw him outside alone, straining to lift it. He became irritable whenever anyone teased him about his advancing age, or when he couldn't do something he had done as a younger man.

Four days after his sixty-seventh birthday, he had a heart attack. An ambulance sped him to the hospital while a paramedic administered CPR to keep blood and oxygen flowing At the hospital, Dad was rushed into an operating room. He was lucky; he survived. But something inside Dad died. His zest for life was gone. He obstinately refused to follow doctor's orders. Suggestions and offers of help were turned aside with sarcasm and insults. The number of visitors thinned, then finally stopped altogether. Dad was left alone.

My husband, Dick, and I asked Dad to come live with us on our small farm. We hoped the fresh air and rustic atmosphere would help him adjust. Within a week after he moved in, I regretted the invitation. It seemed nothing was satisfactory. He criticized everything I did. I became frustrated and moody. Soon I was taking my pent-up anger out on Dick. We began to bicker and argue.

Alarmed, Dick sought out our pastor and explained the situation. The clergyman set up weekly counseling appointments for us. At the close of each session he prayed, asking God to soothe Dad's troubled mind. But the months wore on and God was silent. A raindrop struck my cheek. I looked up into the gray sky. Somewhere up there was "God." Although I believe a Supreme Being had created the universe I had difficulty believing that God cared about the tiny human being on this earth. I was tired of waiting for a God who didn't answer.

Something had to be done and it was up to me to do it. The next day I sat down with the phone book and methodically called each of the mental health clinics listed in the Yellow Pages. I explained my problem in vain to each of the sympathetic voices that answered.

Just when I was giving up hope, one of the voices suddenly exclaimed, "I just read something that might help you! Let me go get the article." I listened as she read. The article described a remarkable study done at a nursing home All of the patients were under treatment for chronic depression. Yet their attitudes had improved dramatically when they were given responsibility for a dog.

I drove to the animal shelter that afternoon. After I filled out a questionnaire, a uniformed officer led me to the kennels. The odor of disinfectant stung my nostrils as I moved down the row of pens. Each contained five to seven dogs. Long-haired dogs, curly-haired dogs, black dogs, spotted dogs - all jumped up, trying to reach me. I studied each one but rejected one after the other for various reasons too big, too small, too much hair.

As I neared the last pen a dog in the shadows of the far corner struggled to his feet, walked to the front of the run and sat down. It was a pointer, one of the dog world's aristocrats. But this was a caricature of the breed. Years had etched his face and muzzle with shades of gray. His hipbones jutted out in lopsided triangles. But it was his eyes that caught and held my attention. Calm and clear, they beheld me unwaveringly.

I pointed to the dog. "Can you tell me about him?"

The officer looked, then shook his head in puzzlement. "He's a funny one. Appeared out of nowhere and sat in front of the gate. We brought him in, figuring someone would be right down to claim him. That was two weeks ago and we've heard nothing. His time is up tomorrow." He gestured helplessly.

As the words sank in I turned to the man in horror. "You mean you're going to kill him?"

"Ma'am," he said gently, "that's our policy. We don't have room for every unclaimed dog."

I looked at the pointer again. The calm brown eyes awaited my decision. "I'll take him," I said.

I drove home with the dog on the front seat beside me. When I reached the house I honked the horn twice.

I was helping my prize out of the car when Dad shuffled onto the front porch. "Ta-da! Look what I got for you, Dad!" I said excitedly.

Dad looked, then wrinkled his face in disgust. "If I had wanted a dog I would have gotten one.

And I would have picked out a better specimen than that bag of bones. Keep it! I don't want it."

Dad waved his arm scornfully and turned back toward the house.

Anger rose inside me. It squeezed together my throat muscles and pounded into my temples.

"You'd better get used to him, Dad. He's staying!" Dad ignored me. "Did you hear me, Dad?" I screamed.

At those words Dad whirled angrily, his hands clenched at his sides, his eyes narrowed and blazing with hate. We stood glaring at each other like duelists, when suddenly the pointer pulled free from my grasp. He wobbled toward my dad and sat down in front of him. Then slowly, carefully, he raised his paw.

Dad's lower jaw trembled as he stared at the uplifted paw. Confusion replaced the anger in his eyes. The pointer waited patiently. Then Dad was on his knees hugging the animal. It was the beginning of a warm and intimate friendship.

Dad named the pointer Cheyenne. Together he and Cheyenne explored the community. They spent long hours walking down dusty lanes. They spent reflective moments on the banks of streams, angling for tasty trout. They even started to attend Sunday services together, Dad sitting in a pew and Cheyenne lying quietly at his feet.

Dad and Cheyenne were inseparable throughout the next three years. Dad's bitterness faded, and he and Cheyenne made many friends. Then late one night I was startled to feel Cheyenne's cold nose burrowing through our bed covers. He had never before come into our bedroom at night. I woke Dick, put on my robe and ran into my father's room. Dad lay in his bed, his face serene. But his spirit had left quietly sometime during the night.

Two days later my shock and grief deepened when I discovered Cheyenne lying dead beside Dad's bed. I wrapped his still form in the rag rug he had slept on. As Dick and I buried him near a favorite fishing hole, I silently thanked the dog for the help he had given me in restoring Dad's peace of mind.

The morning of Dad's funeral dawned overcast and dreary. This day looks like the way I feel, I thought, as I walked down the aisle to the pews reserved for family. I was surprised to see the many friends Dad and Cheyenne had made filling the church.

The pastor began his eulogy. It was a tribute to both Dad and the dog who had changed his life. And then the pastor turned to Hebrews 13:2. "Be not forgetful to entertain strangers." "I've often thanked God for sending that angel," he said.

For me, the past dropped into place, completing a puzzle that I had not seen before: the sympathetic voice that had just read the right article...Cheyenne's unexpected appearance at the animal shelter. His calm acceptance and complete devotion to my father. and the proximity of their deaths. And suddenly I understood. I knew that God had answered my prayers after all

Herbert K. F.
2-21-41
4-12-05
Rest in peace, Uncle "Hubby."

This will never work, but it's worth a try, I guess...

Join the resistance!!!! I hear we are going to hit close to $3.00 a gallon by the summer and it might go higher!! Want gasoline prices to come down? We need to take some intelligent, united action.


Phillip Hollsworth, offered this good idea: This makes MUCH MORE SENSE than the "don't buy gas on a certain day" campaign that was going around last April or May! The oil companies just laughed at that because they knew we wouldn't continue to "hurt" ourselves by refusing to buy gas. It was more of an inconvenience to us than it was a problem for them. BUT, whoever thought of this idea, has come up with a plan that can really work.


Please read it and join with us! By now you're probably thinking gasoline priced at about $1.50 is super cheap. Me too! It is currently $2.09 for regular unleaded in my town. Now that the oil companies and the OPEC nations have conditioned us to think that the cost! of a gallon of gas is CHEAP at $1.50- $1.75, we need to take aggressive action to teach them that BUYERS control the marketplace....not sellers. With the price of gasoline going up more each day, we consumers need to take action. The only way we are going to see the price of gas come down is if we hit someone in the pocketbook by not purchasing their gas! And we can do that WITHOUT hurting ourselves. How? Since we all rely on our cars, we can't just stop buying gas. But we CAN have an impact on gas prices if we all act together to force a price war.


Here's the idea: For the rest of this year, DON'T purchase ANY gasoline from the two biggest companies (which now are one), EXXON and MOBIL. If they are not selling any gas, they will be inclined to reduce their prices. If they reduce their prices, the other companies will have to follow suit. But to have an impact, we need to reach literally millions of Exxon and Mobil gas buyers. It's really simple to do!! Now, don't whimp out on me at this point...keep reading and I'll explain how simple it is to reach millions of people!!


I am sending this note to about thirty people. If each of you send it to at least ten more (30 x 10 = 300) ... and those 300 send it to at least ten more (300 x 10 = 3,000)...and so on, by the time the message reaches the sixth generation of people, we will have reached over THREE MILLION consumers. If those three million get excited and ! pass this on to ten friends each, then 30 million people will have been contacted! If it goes one level further, you guessed it..... THREE HUNDRED MILLION PEOPLE!!!


Again, all You have to do is send this to 10 people. That's all. (If you don't understand how we can reach 300 million and all you have to do is send this to 10 people.... Well, let's face it, you just aren't a mathematician. But I am ... so trust me on this one.)


How long would all that take? If each of us sends this e-mail out to ten more people within one day of receipt, all 300 MILLION people could conceivably be contacted within the next 8 days!!! I'll bet you didn't think you and I had that much potential, did you! Acting together we can make a difference.


If this makes sense to you, please pass this message on. PLEASE HOLD OUT UNTIL THEY LOWER THEIR PRICES TO THE $1.30 RANGE AND KEEP THEM DOWN. THIS CAN REALLY WORK.